The New York Trip “Miss Kleiman Goes to the Big Apple”

Sorry, I know I said I was going to be ready yesterday…. What can I say?   bad blogger!

So on to day two in the Empire State.

Day two dawns cold, windy, and cloudy… typical NY winter weather. Middle is up and raring to go, me, not so much. It seems you should not imbibe a bunch of wine and then Maker’s Mark in a few hours sitting…go figure!

Once my head clears, we’re in get out mode with Middle taking a very long (30+ minutes) shower. Of course being a good Florida girl she comes out of the room dressed and ready to leave and “Daddy, don’t worry about my hair it will dry in the car…”

Little girl, this is New York, its December, and its in the upper 30’s. You will have to blow dry your hair before we can go anywhere… “Oh, ok, I guess”.

Blow and style complete and off to find a Citibank. One of the things I truly despise about NY is the constant barrage of tolls. I’m not used to tolls in Florida and I rarely carry cash in pocket opting instead for plastic. NY its the opposite and I’m forced to carry cash. I had enough money on hand yesterday to get me across the Atlantic Beach Bridge and that was it. If I want to get to the Belt Parkway in a reasonable amount of time I’m gonna need green!

Middle and I drive into Long Beach, next town over, to go to Citibank and fix our deficit. The Citibank branch there has certain advantages to a person born in NY but who learned to drive in Florida…..nose in parking! Doesn’t sound too big a deal unless you’re the person in question and you don’t want to parallel park in front of your daughter for fear of embarrassment! Unfortunately, Sandy got to the branch a few weeks before I did and left in shambles. God I hate that bitch!

Alright this is dragging on too long, Assume I found an ATM at Waldbaums on Park and lets move the hell on!

Before heading into the City which was the plan I wanted to stop at a favorite of mine; Brennan and Carr on Nostrand Ave in Brooklyn. My family has been eating there for 5 generations now and I always remember it being really, really good. I got my usual of Beef Broth and a Roast Beef sandwich.

The problem with fond memories of a restaurant are sometimes its just that, memories. In this case the broth was great, the sandwich…well, uh, bland actually!

Back on the Belt and off to the City! We pass various landmarks on the Belt that I point out to Middle and explain what they are and what they mean to me, passing Nellie Bly Amusement Park elicited a what the hell from me and a “Daddy Daddy DADDY can we stop?!?” from Middle. The Verrezano bridge got a “oh my god is that that thing BIIIIIIIIIG!!! Can we go over it, can we can we???!!” Uhm, no firstly you don’t go to Staten Island unless you have to. Secondly its like $10 for the privilege of driving across that thing. Thirdly, because. well. I don’t know but I’m sure I’ll think of it!

We pass Liberty Island and Middle gets her first view of Liberty Enlightening the World, otherwise locally known as the Statue in the middle of NY harbor we’ve all been forced to go to on school field trips and none of us enjoyed except for the gift shop!

On the Gowanus making good headway into the city I see Hugh L. Carey Tunnel. What the hell is a Hugh L. Carey? And why does it have a tunnel, and where does said tunnel go? What the hell has Mayor Mike done with the Battery Tunnel? Whatever it is, its apparently $6.50 to go through it. BQE and Brooklyn Bridge here we come! Yes I am that cheap and yes I am that petty too!

Little Girl, what do you want to do? “Intrepid!” that’s my girly! Little Girl, Intrepid is closed thanks to Hurricane Screw Daddy Over and we won’t be able to board her. “Whatever, can you drive past her at least?” Yes Mam, that I can do!

Once past Intrepid Middle decides that she wants to go to the Empire State building. Good, thank god she focused on something, anything! I was afraid I’d be driving her up and down the island for hours! Parking garage on 34th found onward to to the Empire State building. “Daddy… where is Macy’s?” says Middle just passing Madison Square Garden. Uhm, Macy’s? Macy’s the department store? Um, Town Center Mall Glades Rd, in Boca…. Please don’t let her see the sign, please let her focus her eyes somewhere else! I don’t want to go in there December First, its suicide! “Daddy!!!!! Macy’s is on the next block, can we go in??!!”


In we go to the flagship store where Middle is barraged by people, more people, and lots more people where those people came from. Middle is not pleased and wants out, now!

Told ya!

At the Empire State building we breeze through the lines and up to the 86th floor we go, making a quick pit stop on the 80th floor to meet this guy:

Yes Virginia, there is a man in the Kong suit! Scared the hell outa Middle….and me too.

And there be Middle, the culmination of years of begging, pleading, cajoling, and outright blackmail finally at her destination; the 86th Floor of the Empire State Building! Great says I, can I call Jetblue and get the hell out of here tonight? “Whaaaat? No Daddy, we still haven’t been to FAU Schwarts”

Little Girl, its FAO Schwartz, and its way way way up town from here!


4 thoughts on “The New York Trip “Miss Kleiman Goes to the Big Apple”

  1. Pingback: Corey's Views | Post the Twenty First “the Further Adventures of Middle in New York”

Leave a Reply